My grandfather has died, due to complications after heart surgery. I wont lie, I feel pretty raw about this. Anyone would. I think what bothers me the most isn’t his passing, it’s the fact that I found out in a Chain-Email from my Aunt … 3 days afterwards. For 5 mins I couldn’t concentrate, I tried to find my address book. Eventually my fingers worked and I managed to call my father. He said he hadn’t wanted me to worry. Well thank you..but.. This is my family. My grandfather is dead. I regret to tell you I know so little about him. He was a quiet man to me, because I was very rarely at family events and Im sure he had no dislike for me, we just shared no relationship. Im crying right now for my grandmother, who is the hardest woman I know. She, who shares my birthday, who I also didn’t know very much about for years until recently. Her husband of 62 years is now gone, and I cannot imagine how she can cope. I cannot imagine coping. But she is, I called her as well. She sounded weary. This is to be expected. I miss her. I told her I loved her very much. I don’t think I say it enough. Im sorry for that..
Im so fucking far away.
My dad told me I didn’t need to come, I didn’t need to change my plans for May/June. I understand his consideration here, but I want to be there. I know I cant really, and now that he’s told me basically to stay put, I feel as if Id be pushing my way in. Part of me is really sad that they felt a need to cover this up. Why wasn’t I told right away? Soon..after everyone can lift their heads again, Im going to have a sit down chat with my dad. It really hurts that they feel a need to buffer me from this, just because Im far away doesn’t mean I don’t deserve to be told these things as everyone else in the family finds out. I found out in an email..sent to my aunts friends. How completely informal. I need him to know I don’t want it to ever be like that again. I do not want to find out, days or weeks after that my grandmother has passed away. And I will fight to come to the states in that event as well. I don’t care what he says.
Im rambling.
Anyways, I thought Id include the Obituary.
SIMON, Armott A. "Si" age 86, of Dayton, passed away Wednesday, March 13, 2007. Si was born on April 8, 1920 in Dayton to Joseph and Clara (Pour) Simon. He was preceded in death by his son Thomas on January 11, 1996 and his parents. He is survived by his wife of 62 years, Jean; his daughter, Sharon Horvath and her husband Joseph of Centerville; two sons, Terry Simon of Dayton and Tim Simon of Dayton; Six grandchildren Derrick, Kelly, Aaron, Aarika, Stacie, and Monica; nine great grandchildren; his great great grandson; his brother Robert J. Simon of Tipp City; and a host of other relatives and friends. Si was a 1938 graduate of Stivers High School, served in the U.S. Navy during WW II; and retired from W.P.A.F.B. after 30 years. Besides his family, one of Si's loves in life was golfing with his friends. Friends may call from 2-5:00 p.m. Sunday, March 18, 2007 at the TOBIAS FUNERAL HOME – FAR HILLS CHAPEL, 5471 Far Hills Avenue at Rahn Road. Prayers 9:15 a.m. Monday, March 19, 2007 at the funeral home with the Mass of Christian Burial 10:00 a.m. at Holy Angels Catholic Church, 218 K Street, Dayton. Memorial contributions may be made to the Miami Valley Down Syndrome Association, 1133 S. Edwin C. Moses Blvd., Suite 190, Dayton, Ohio 45408 or to the charity of your choice. Condolences may be made to www.tobiasfuneralhome.com
I wish I had known you better.
Love, your grandaughter Anna.
